'The Lost Duke of Wyndham Chapter Nineteen\r'

' The assume to besideslersbridge was e precise(prenominal)thing jackfruit remembered. The trees, the birds, the precise shade of green as the wind ruffled the grass…These were the sights and impenetrables of his childhood. no(prenominal)hing had changed. It ought to scram been comforting.\r\nIt wasnt.\r\nWhen he pioneered his eye that morning, dramatize had already slipped from the bed and made her way patronage to her ingest means. He was disappointed, of stemma; hed been awakened by his protest live and desire for her, and motiveed nonhing to a spacio delectationr extent than to gather her back into his arms.\r\n to a greater extentover he had unders withald. dinero and barelyter was non as free for a adult female as for a man, even a woman of independent means. aggrandise had her reputation to consider. doubting doubting doubting Thomas and Amelia would never declare a word against her, that diddlysquat did non hunch over Lord Crowland well exu berant to guess what he dexterity do if thanksgiving were caught in his bed. And as for the dowager…\r\nWell, it went with turn up swearing that shed happily pulverize compassion this instant, if addicted the chance.\r\nThe traveling party †minus the dowager, to any angiotensin converting enzymes relief †met up in the inns dining room for breakfast. yap knew hed been unable to keep his tenderness from his hang when he truism benediction enter the room.\r\nWould it eternally be this way, he wondered. Would he percolate her and step this indescribable, overwhelming passel of determineing?\r\nIt wasnt even desire. It was utter near such(prenominal) than that.\r\nIt was love.\r\nLove. With a capital L and swirly ledger and hearts and flowers and whatever else the angels †and yes, all those annoying minuscular cupids †wished to use for embellishment.\r\nLove. It could be null else. He saw fancify and he entangle joy. zero(prenominal) bonnie his joy, merely e really anes. The stranger sit behind him. The experience across the room. He saw it all. He felt it all.\r\nIt was staggering. Humbling. deck tinctureed at him, and he was a check man.\r\nAnd she feeling he would allow some(prenominal)one to keep them apart.\r\nIt would non surpass. He would non let it happen.\r\nThrough step up breakfast she did non precisely avoid him †in that location were remote too many shared glistens and secret smiles for that. nonwithstanding she had been careful non to encounterk him out, and indeed, hed not had an luck to speak with her even at a sentence. He believably wouldnt obtain been able to do so even if compassion was not so inclined to be prudent; Amelia slipped her hand in bedights right wing afterwards breakfast and did not let go.\r\nSafety in numbers, jackass determined. The deuce ladies were stuck in the coach all daylight with the dowager. He would see been blindly delveing f or a hand if labored to endure the same.\r\nThe three gentlemen rode on horseback, taking advantage of the fine weather. Lord Crowland headstrong to gather up a seat in the pushcart after their first stop to water the horses, plainly thirty minutes later he was lurch back out, declaring the ride farther less tire out than the dowager.\r\nâ€Å"You would abandon your daughter to the dowagers venom?” yap asked mildly.\r\nCrowland did not even try to piss excuses. â€Å"I did not say I was proud of myself.”\r\nâ€Å"The Outer Hebrides,” Thomas verbalise, trotting by. â€Å"Im telling you, Audley, its the key to your happiness.\r\nThe Outer Hebrides.”\r\nâ€Å"The Outer Hebrides?” Crowland echoed, interpreting from man to man for explanation.\r\nâ€Å"Almost as far as the Orkneys,” Thomas express cheerfully. â€Å"And a lot more than fun to say.”\r\nâ€Å"Have you holdings thither?” Crowland asked.\r\nâ€Å"Not ye t,” Thomas replied. He looked over at Jack. â€Å"Perhaps you croup restore a nunnery. Something with insurmountable walls.”\r\nJack found himself enjoying the mental picture. â€Å"How squander you lived with her for so pertinacious?” he asked.\r\nThomas move his orient. â€Å"I comport no idea.”\r\nThey were talking as if it were already decided, Jack realized. They were talking as if he had already been named the duke. And Thomas did not seem to mind. If anything, he appeared to be aspect before to his imminent dispossession.\r\nJack looked back at the strength. dump had insisted that she could not marry him if he was the duke. And yet, he could not imagine doing it without her. He was unprepared for the duties that came with the title.\r\nAstoundingly so. unless she knew what to do, didnt she? Shed lived at Belgrave for tail finsomesome days. She had to be how the place was run. She knew the name of every last servant, and as far as he could tell, their birthdays, too.\r\nShe was kind. She was gracious. She was innately fair, of impeccable judgment, and far more saying(a) than he.\r\nHe could not imagine a more perfect duchess.\r\nBut he did not compliments to be the duke.\r\nHe truly didnt.\r\nHed gone over it in his mind countless eras, reminding himself of all of the reasons wherefore hed make a very bad Duke of Wyndham, tho had he ever actually arise out and verbalize it plainly?\r\nHe did not motivation to be the duke.\r\nHe looked over at Thomas, who was looking up at the sun, shading his eye with his hand.\r\nâ€Å"It mustiness be past noon,” Lord Crowland say. â€Å"Shall we stop for eat?”\r\nJack shrugged. It did not matter to him.\r\nâ€Å"For the sake of the ladies,” Crowland said.\r\nAs one, they false and looked over their shoulders toward the carriage.\r\nJack thought he saw Crowland cringe. â€Å"Its not pretty in there,” he said in a low voice.\r\nJack quirk ed a brow.\r\nâ€Å"The dowager,” Crowland said, shuddering. â€Å"Amelia tapdanceged me to let her ride after we watered the horses.”\r\nâ€Å"That would be too cruel to clothe,” Jack said.\r\nâ€Å"Thats what I told Amelia.”\r\nâ€Å"As you were fleeing the carriage,” Thomas murmured, smiling plainly a small.\r\nCrowland cocked his head. â€Å"I would never claim otherwise.”\r\nâ€Å"And I would never chastise you for it.”\r\nJack listened to the exchange with teeny-weeny interest. By his estimation, they were well-nigh halfway to Butlersbridge, and it was growing increasingly hard to catch humor in the inane. â€Å"There is a clearing a mile or so ahead,” he said. â€Å"Ive stopped there before. Its suitable for a duck soup.”\r\nThe two other men nodded their agreement, and about five minutes later theyd found the spot. Jack dismounted and went instantly to the carriage. A groom was economic aiding the la dies down, hardly as gentleness would be the last to alight, it was easy adequate for him to position himself so he cogency take her hand when she emerged.\r\nâ€Å"Mr. Audley,” forgiveness said. She was nothing still polite, but her eyes shone with a secret warmth.\r\nâ€Å"Miss Eversleigh.” He looked down at her mouth. The corners were moving slightly…very slightly. She indispensablenessed to smile. He could see it.\r\nHe could experience it.\r\nâ€Å"I go forth eat in the carriage,” the dowager announced sharply. â€Å"Only hea hences eat on the ground.”\r\nJack tapped his office and grinned. â€Å"Proud to be a hea because.” He quirked his head toward thanksgiving. â€Å"And you?”\r\nâ€Å"Very proud.”\r\nThe dowager marched once around the perimeter of the theater of operations †to stretch her legs, she said †and indeed disappeared back inwardly the carriage.\r\nâ€Å"That must name been very diff icult for her,” Jack commented, watching her go.\r\n floor had been examining the contents of a picnic basket, but at that she looked up. â€Å"Difficult?”\r\nâ€Å"There is no one to harass in the carriage,” he explained.\r\nâ€Å"I think she feels that we have all ganged up upon her.”\r\nâ€Å"We have.”\r\nGrace looked conflicted. â€Å"Yes, but †â€Å"\r\nOh… no. He was not exit to listen to her make excuses for the dowager. â€Å"Dont tell me that you harbor any sympathy toward her.”\r\nâ€Å"No.” Grace shook her head. â€Å"I wouldnt say that, but †â€Å"\r\nâ€Å"You are far too softhearted.”\r\nAt that she smiled. Sheepishly. â€Å"Perhaps.”\r\nOnce the blankets were laid out, Jack maneuvered them so they were seated a bit apart from the others. It was not very difficult †or very plain †to do so; Amelia had sat down hereafter(a) to her father, who appeared to be delivering some ph ysique of lecture, and Thomas had wandered off, probably in search of a tree that need watering.\r\nâ€Å"Is this the road you traveled when you went to school in capital of Ireland?” Grace asked, reaching for a slice of bread and cheese.\r\nâ€Å"Yes.”\r\nHed tried to keep the tightness out of his voice, but he must not have succeeded, because when he looked at her, she was regarding him in that unsettling way of hers. â€Å"Why dont you want to go home?”\r\nshe asked.\r\nIt was on the tip of his expectoration to say that her imagination was too active, or, since he actually ought to be reverting to form, something clever and grandiose, involving sunshine, twittering birds, and milk of kind kindness.\r\nStatements like that had got him out of far more nice situations than this.\r\nBut he hadnt the energy dependable now, nor the forget.\r\nAnd, anyway, Grace knew meliorate. She knew him better. He could be his usual flip and idiotic self, and most of th e time †he hoped †she would love him for it. But not when he was nerve-racking to hide the truth.\r\nOr hide from the truth.\r\nâ€Å"Its complicated,” he said, because at least that wasnt a lie.\r\nShe nodded and sullen to her lunch. He waited for another question, but none were forthcoming. So he picked up an apple.\r\nHe looked over. She was wounding into a slice of roast chicken, her eyes on her utensils. He assailable his mouth to speak, thus decided not to, so brought the apple to his mouth.\r\nThen didnt turn into it.\r\nâ€Å"Its been over five geezerhood,” he blurted out.\r\nShe looked up. â€Å"Since youve been home?”\r\nHe nodded.\r\nâ€Å"Thats a keen-sighted time.”\r\nâ€Å"Very long.”\r\nâ€Å"Too long?”\r\nHis fingers tightened around the apple. â€Å"No.”\r\nShe took a few bites of her meal, then looked up. â€Å"Would you like me to slice that apple for you?”\r\nHe reach it over, mostly bec ause hed forgotten he was holding it. â€Å"I had a cousin, you pick out.” Bloody hell, where had that come from? He hadnt meant to say anything about Arthur. Hed spent the last five years trying not to think about him, trying to make certainly that Arthurs was not the last face he saw before he cut asleep at night.\r\nâ€Å"I thought youd said you had three cousins,” Grace said. She wasnt looking at him; she gave every sign of giving her complete focus to the apple and knife in her pass on.\r\nâ€Å"Only two now.”\r\nShe looked up, her eyes large with sympathy. â€Å"I am sorry.”\r\nâ€Å"Arthur died in France.” The language sounded rusty. He realized it had been a long time since hed said Arthurs name aloud. Five years, probably.\r\nâ€Å"With you?” Grace asked softly.\r\nHe nodded.\r\nShe looked down at the apple slices, now neatly arranged on a plate. She didnt seem to get along what to do with them.\r\nâ€Å"Youre not going to s ay that it wasnt my happy chance?” he said, and he hated the sound of his voice. It was hollow, and pained, and sarcastic, and desperate, and he couldnt opine what hed besides said.\r\nâ€Å"I wasnt there,” she said.\r\nHis eyes flew to her face.\r\nâ€Å"I cant imagine how it would have been your charge, but I wasnt there.” She reached across the food and laid her hand briefly atop his. â€Å"Im sorry. Were you c hurt?”\r\nHe nodded, turning away and pretence to look at the trees. â€Å"Not so much when we were young. But after we left for school…” He pinched the bridge of his nose, wondering how to explain just what Arthur had done for him. â€Å"…we found much more in common.”\r\nHer fingers tightened around his, and then she let go. â€Å"It is difficult to lose someone you love.”\r\nHe looked back at her once he was satisfied that his eyes would remain dry. â€Å"When you woolly your parents…”\r\nâ⠂¬Å"It was horrible,” she answered. Her lips moved at the corners, but not into a smile. It was one of those flashes of movement †a tiny, little rush of emotion, escaping almost without notice. â€Å"I didnt think I should die,” Grace said softly, â€Å"but I did not know how I would live.”\r\nâ€Å"I wish…” But he didnt know what he wished. That he could have been there for her? What good would he have been? Five years ago hed been broken, too.\r\nâ€Å"The dowager saved me,” she said. She smiled wryly. â€Å"Isnt that funny?”\r\nHis brows rose. â€Å"Oh, come now. The dowager does nothing out of the goodness of her heart.”\r\nâ€Å"I did not say why she did it, just that she did. I should have been forced to marry my cousin if she had not taken me in.”\r\nHe took her hand and brought it to his lips. â€Å"I am glad you did not.”\r\nâ€Å"So am I,” she said, without any trace of tenderness. â€Å"He is awful.”\r\nJack chuckled. â€Å"And here Id hoped you were relieved to have waited for me.”\r\nShe gave him an arch look and withdrew her hand. â€Å"You have not met my cousin.”\r\nHe finally took one of the apple pieces and bit into it. â€Å"We have an overabundance of woeful relations, you and I.”\r\nHer lips kinky in thought, and then her body twisted so that she could look back toward the carriage. â€Å"I should go to her,” she said.\r\nâ€Å"No, you shouldnt,” Jack said firmly.\r\nGrace sighed. She did not want to feel sorry for the dowager, not after what the dowager had said to her the night before. But her conference with Jack had brought back memories…and reminded her just how very much she was indebted to her.\r\nShe turned back to Jack. â€Å"She is all entirely.”\r\nâ€Å"She deserves to be alone.” He said this with great conviction, and more than a touch of surprise, as if he could not believe the mat ter might be under discussion.\r\nâ€Å"No one deserves to be alone.”\r\nâ€Å"Do you really believe that?”\r\nShe didnt, but…”I want to believe it.”\r\nHe looked at her dubiously.\r\nGrace started to rise. She looked this way and that, making sure no one could hear, and said, â€Å"You should not have been kissing my hand where the great unwashed can see, anyway.”\r\nShe stood then, stepping quickly away, before he had a chance to make a reply.\r\nâ€Å"Have you complete your lunch?” Amelia called out as she passed.\r\nGrace nodded. â€Å"Yes. I am going to the carriage to see if the dowager needs anything.”\r\nAmelia looked at her as if shed gone mad.\r\nGrace gave a little shrug. â€Å" eachbody deserves a second chance.” She thought about that, then added, mostly to herself, â€Å"That, I really do believe.” She marched over to the carriage. It was too high for her to climb up herself, and the grooms were nowhe re in sight, so she called out, â€Å"Your pity! Your grace!”\r\nThere was no reply, so she said, a little louder, â€Å"Maam!”\r\nThe dowagers irate visage appeared in the extend doorway. â€Å"What do you want?”\r\nGrace reminded herself that she had not spent a living of Sunday mornings in perform for nothing. â€Å"I wished to inquire if you needed anything, your grace.”\r\nâ€Å"Why?”\r\n reasoned heavens, she was suspicious. â€Å"Because I am a nice person,” Grace said, somewhat impatiently.\r\nAnd then she crossed her arms, waiting to see what the dowager said to that.\r\nThe dowager stared down at her for several moments, then said, â€Å"It is my experience that nice people dont need to say themselves as such.”\r\nGrace wanted to inquire what sort of experience the dowager had with nice people, since it was her own experience that most nice people fled the dowagers presence.\r\nBut that seemed catty.\r\nShe took a breat h. She did not have to do this. She did not have to help the dowager in any way. She was her own woman now, and she did not need to worry over her security.\r\nBut she was, as she had noted, a nice person. And she was determined to remain a nice person, regardless of her improved circumstances. She had waited upon the dowager for the last five years because shed had to, not because she wanted to. And now…\r\nWell, she distillery didnt want to. But shed do it. Whatever the dowagers motives five years ago, she had saved Grace from a lifetime of unhappiness. And for that, she could spend an min attending to the dowager. But more than that, she could choose to spend an hour attending to her.\r\nIt was amazing what a difference that made.\r\nâ€Å"Maam?” Grace said. That was all. moreover maam. Shed said teeming. It was up to the dowager now.\r\nâ€Å"Oh, very well,” she said irritably. â€Å"If you feel you must.”\r\nGrace kept her face utterly dispassion ate as she allowed Lord Crowland (who had caught the latter half of the conversation and told Grace she was mad) to help her up. She took her prescribed seat †liner backward, as far from the dowager as possible †and folded her hands neatly in her lap. She did not know how long they would be sitting here; the others had not seemed quite an ready to quit their lunch.\r\nThe dowager was looking out the windowpane; Grace kept her eyes on her hands. Every now and then shed steal a glance up, and every time, the dowager was still turned away, her posture hard and stiff, her lips pinched tight.\r\nAnd then †perhaps the fifth time Grace looked up †the dowager was staring straight at her.\r\nâ€Å"You disappoint me,” she said, her voice low †not quite hiss, but something close to it.\r\nGrace held her silence. She held everything, it seemed †her posture, her breath. She did not know what to say, except that she would not apologize. Not for having the a udacity to reach out for happiness.\r\nâ€Å"You were not suppositious to leave.”\r\nâ€Å"I was but a servant, maam.”\r\nâ€Å"You were not supposed(p) to leave,” the dowager said again, but this time something within her seemed to shake. Not quite her body, and not quite her voice.\r\nHer heart, Grace realized with a rap. Her heart was shaking.\r\nâ€Å"He is not what I expect,” the dowager said.\r\nGrace blinked, trying to follow. â€Å"Mr. Audley?”\r\nâ€Å"Cavendish,” the dowager said sharply.\r\nâ€Å"You did not know that he existed,” Grace said, as gently as she was able. â€Å"How could you have expected anything?”\r\nThe dowager did not answer. Not that question, anyway. â€Å"Do you know why I took you into my home?”\r\nshe asked instead.\r\nâ€Å"No,” Grace said softly.\r\nThe dowagers lips press together for a moment before she said, â€Å"It was not right. A person should not be alone in this wor ld.”\r\nâ€Å"No,” Grace said again. And she believed it, with her whole heart.\r\nâ€Å"It was for the both(prenominal) of us. I took a terrible thing and turned it into good. For both of us.” Her eyes narrowed, boring into Graces. â€Å"You were not supposed to leave.”\r\nAnd then †good heavens, Grace could not believe she was saying it, but: â€Å"I depart come visit you, should you wish.”\r\nThe dowager swallowed, and she looked straight ahead when she said, â€Å"That would be acceptable.”\r\nGrace was saved from further reply by the comer of Amelia, who informed them that they would depart momentarily. And indeed, shed had barely enough time to settle into her seat when the carriage wheels creaked into motion, and they began to roll forward.\r\nNo one spoke.\r\nIt was better that way.\r\nSeveral hours later, Grace opened her eyes.\r\nAmelia was staring at her. â€Å"You fell asleep,” she said quietly, then put her finger t o her lips as she motioned to the dowager, who had also dozed off.\r\nGrace covered a yawn, then asked, â€Å"How much long-term do you think we have until we get there?”\r\nâ€Å"I dont know.” Amelia gave a little shrug. â€Å"Perhaps an hour? Two?” She sighed then, and leaned back.\r\nShe looked tired, Grace thought. They were all tired.\r\nAnd scared.\r\nâ€Å"What will you do?” Grace asked, before she had the chance to think better of it.\r\nAmelia did not open her eyes. â€Å"I dont know.”\r\nIt was not much of an answer, but then again, it hadnt been a fair question.\r\nâ€Å"Do you know what the funniest part of it is?” Amelia asked quite suddenly.\r\nGrace shook her head, then remembered that Amelias eyes were still closed and said, â€Å"No.”\r\nâ€Å"I keep thinking to myself, ‘This isnt fair. I should have a choice. I should not have to be traded and bartered like some sort of commodity. But then I think, ‘How is this any different? I was given to Wyndham years ago. I never made a complaint.”\r\nâ€Å"You were just a baby,” Grace said.\r\nStill, Amelia did not open her eyes, and when she spoke, her voice was quiet and full of recrimination. â€Å"I have had many years to lodge a complaint.”\r\nâ€Å"Amelia †â€Å"\r\nâ€Å"I have no one to denounce but myself.”\r\nâ€Å"Thats not true.”\r\nAmelia finally opened her eyes. One of them, at least. â€Å"Youre just saying that.”\r\nâ€Å"No, Im not. I would,” Grace admitted, because it was true. â€Å"But as it happens, I am telling the truth. It isnt your blur. Its not anyones fault, really.” She took a breath. Let it out. â€Å"I wish it were. It would be so much easier that way.”\r\nâ€Å"To have someone to blame?”\r\nâ€Å"Yes.”\r\nAnd then Amelia verbalise, â€Å"I dont want to marry him.”\r\nâ€Å"Thomas?” Grace asked. Amelia had spent so long as his fiancee, and they did not seem to have any great affection for one another.\r\nAmelia looked at her curiously. â€Å"No. Mr. Audley.”\r\nâ€Å" unfeignedly?”\r\nâ€Å"You sound so shocked.”\r\nâ€Å"No, of course not,” Grace said hurriedly. What was she to say to Amelia †that she was so desperately in love with him herself that she could not imagine anyone not wanting him? â€Å"Its just that hes so handsome,” she improvised.\r\nAmelia gave a little shrug. â€Å"I suppose.”\r\nShe supposed? Hadnt she ever seen him smile?\r\nBut then Amelia said, â€Å"Dont you find him a little too charming?”\r\nâ€Å"No.” Grace immediately looked down at her hands, because her no had come out in not at all the tone of voice shed intended. And indeed, Amelia must have heard it, too, because her next words were â€\r\nâ€Å"Grace Eversleigh, do you fancy Mr. Audley?”\r\nGrace stammered and stumbled, and managed a rathe r croaky, â€Å"I †” before Amelia cut in with â€\r\nâ€Å"You do.”\r\nâ€Å"It does not signify,” Grace said, because what was she supposed to say? To Amelia, who might or might not be engaged to marry him.\r\nâ€Å"Of course it signifies. Does he fancy you?”\r\nGrace wanted to black market into the seat.\r\nâ€Å"No,” Amelia said, sounding highly amused. â€Å"Dont answer. I can see from your face that he does. Well.\r\nI certainly shall not marry him now.”\r\nGrace swallowed. Her throat tasted bitter. â€Å"You should not hold out him on my account.”\r\nâ€Å"What did you just say?”\r\nâ€Å"I cant marry him if hes the duke.”\r\nâ€Å"Why not?”\r\nGrace tried to smile, because really, it was reinvigorated of Amelia to ignore the difference in their positions. But she could not quite manage it. â€Å"If he is the duke, he will need to marry someone suitable. Of your rank.”\r\nâ€Å"Oh, dont be silly,” Amelia scoffed. â€Å"Its not as if you grew up in an orphanage.”\r\nâ€Å"There will be scandal enough. He must not add to it with a sensational marriage.”\r\nâ€Å"An actress would be sensational. You will merely be a weeks worth of gossip.”\r\nIt would be more than that, but Grace saw no point in arguing further. But then Amelia said â€\r\nâ€Å"I do not know Mr. Audleys mind, or his intentions, but if he is prepared to presume everything for love, then you should be, too.”\r\nGrace looked at her. How was it that Amelia suddenly looked so very wise? When had that happened?\r\nWhen had she stopped being Elizabeths little sister and become…herself?\r\nAmelia reached out and squeezed her hand. â€Å"Be a woman of courage, Grace.” She smiled then, murmuring something to herself as she turned and looked out the window.\r\nGrace stared straight ahead, thinking…wondering…was Amelia right? Or was it just that she had never faced stiffness? It was easy to talk about being adventuresome when one had never come face-to-face with desperation.\r\nWhat would happen if a woman of her background married a duke? Thomass mother had not been an aristocrat, but when she married his father, he was only third in line to inherit, and no one had expected her to become a duchess. By all accounts, she had been dreadfully unhappy. Miserable, even.\r\nBut Thomass parents had not love each other. They had not even liked each other, from what Grace had heard.\r\nBut she love Jack.\r\nAnd he loved her.\r\nStill, it would all be so much simpler if he turned out not to be the genuine son of John Cavendish.\r\nAnd then, out of nowhere, Amelia whispered, â€Å"We could blame the dowager.” As Grace turned to her in confusion, Amelia clarified, â€Å"For this. You said it would be easier if we had someone to blame.”\r\nGrace looked over at the dowager, who was seated across from Amelia. She was snoring sof tly, and her head was perched at what had to be an uncomfortable angle. It was remarkable, but even in eternal sleep her mouth was pinched and virulent.\r\nâ€Å"Its certainly more her fault than anyone elses,” Amelia added, but Grace noted that she tossed a sick glance at the dowager as she spoke.\r\nGrace nodded, murmuring, â€Å"I cannot disagree with that.”\r\nAmelia stared off into space for several seconds, and then, just when Grace was convinced that she did not plan to respond, she said, â€Å"It didnt make me feel any better.”\r\nâ€Å"Blaming the dowager?”\r\nâ€Å"Yes.” Amelias shoulders slumped a bit. â€Å"Its still horrible. The whole thing.”\r\nâ€Å"Dreadful,” Grace agreed.\r\nAmelia turned and looked at her directly. â€Å"Sodding bad.”\r\nGrace gasped. â€Å"Amelia!”\r\nAmelias face wrinkled in thought. â€Å"Did I use that correctly?”\r\nâ€Å"I wouldnt know.”\r\nâ€Å"Oh, come now, d ont tell me you havent thought something just as unladylike.”\r\nâ€Å"I wouldnt say it.”\r\nThe look Amelia gave her was as clear as a dare. â€Å"But you thought it.”\r\nGrace felt her lips twitch. â€Å"Its a call forth shame.”\r\nâ€Å"A bloody inconvenience, if you ask me,” Amelia responded, fast enough so Grace knew shed been saving that one.\r\nâ€Å"I have an advantage, you know,” Grace said archly.\r\nâ€Å"Oh, really?”\r\nâ€Å"Indeed. I am privy to the servants talk.”\r\nâ€Å"Oh, come now, you wont be convincing me that the housemaids at Belgrave talk like the fishmonger.”\r\nâ€Å"No, but sometimes the footmen do.”\r\nâ€Å"In front of you?”\r\nâ€Å"Not on purpose,” Grace admitted, â€Å"but it happens.”\r\nâ€Å"Very well.” Amelia turned to her with quirked lips and humor in her eyes. â€Å"Do your worst.”\r\nGrace thought for a moment and then, after darting a qui ck glance across the carriage to make sure that the dowager was still asleep, she leaned forward and whispered in Amelias ear.\r\nWhen she was through, Amelia drew back and stared at her, act reflexively three times before saying, â€Å"Im not sure I know what that means.”\r\nGrace frowned. â€Å"I dont think I do, either.”\r\nâ€Å"It sounds bad, though.”\r\nâ€Å"Sodding bad,” Grace said with a smile, and she patted Amelias hand.\r\nAmelia sighed. â€Å"A damned shame.”\r\nâ€Å"Were repeating ourselves,” Grace pointed out.\r\nâ€Å"I know,” Amelia said, with a fair bit of feeling. â€Å"But whose fault is it? Not ours. Weve been far too sheltered.”\r\nâ€Å"Now that,” Grace announced with flair, â€Å"really is a damned shame.”\r\nâ€Å"A bloody inconvenience, if you ask me.”\r\nâ€Å"What the mystify are the two of you talking about?”\r\nGrace gulped, and she stole a glance at Amelia, who was s taring at the now quite awake dowager with a similar look of horror.\r\nâ€Å"Well?” the dowager demanded.\r\nâ€Å"Nothing,” Grace chirped.\r\nThe dowager regarded her with a most unpleasant expression, then turned her icy attentions to Amelia.\r\nâ€Å"And you, Lady Amelia. Where is your education?”\r\nAnd then Amelia †oh, dear heavens †she shrugged her shoulders and said, â€Å"Damned if I know.”\r\nGrace tried to hold still, but her shock positively burst out of her, and she rather feared she stir upon the dowager. Which did seem ironic, that the first time she did such a thing, it should be accidental.\r\nâ€Å"You are disgusting,” the dowager hissed. â€Å"I cannot believe I considered forgiving you.”\r\nâ€Å"Stop picking on Grace,” Amelia said. With affect force.\r\nGrace turned to Amelia in surprise.\r\nThe dowager, however, was furious. â€Å"I beg your pardon.”\r\nâ€Å"I said, stop picking on Grace.â⠂¬Â\r\nâ€Å"And who do you think you are, to order me about?”\r\nAs Grace watched Amelia, she would have sworn she changed right before her very eyes. Gone was the unsure girl, in her place was: â€Å"The future Duchess of Wyndham, or so Im told.”\r\nGraces lips parted in shock. And admiration.\r\nâ€Å"Because really,” Amelia added disdainfully, â€Å"if Im not, what the devil am I doing here, halfway across Ireland?”\r\nGraces eyes darted from Amelia to the dowager and back. And then back again. And then â€\r\nWell, suffice it to say, it was a monstrously long moment of silence.\r\nâ€Å"Do not speak again,” the dowager finally said. â€Å"I cannot tolerate the sound of your voices.”\r\nAnd indeed, they all remained silent for the rest of the journey. Even the dowager.\r\n'